Funny Bad Jokes

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Girl: So, how many times a day do you shave?

Man: Well, about 15-20 times every day.

Girl: My god, are you some kind of crazy?

Man: No, I’m a barber.
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Man1: I am a master of fast calculations.

Man2: OK, what is 758 time 642 divided by 5?”

Man1: 22!

Man2: Ha ha, that’s wrong!

Man1: Might be, but it was fast!
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At work:

Man1: Excuse me, may I disturb you shortly?

Man2: Of course, what is it?

Man1: Nothing, I just wanted to disturb you.
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Andy has 150 candy bars. He eats 125. What does Andy have now?

Andy has diabetes now.
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Man1: I have good news and bad news. Which do you want to hear first?

Man2: The good news.

Man1: The good news is that I have no bad news.
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Question: What is blue and smells like red paint?

Ans: Blue paint.
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What is the difference between a soccer star and a bank robber?

The bank robber goes, “Give me the money or I shoot!”
The soccer star goes, “Give me the money or I don’t shoot!”
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Q: Is Google male or female?

A: Female, because it doesn't let you finish a sentence before making a suggestion.
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Wife: "Our new neighbor always kisses his wife when he leaves for work. Why don't you do that?"
Husband: "How can I? I don't even know her."
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Q. Why did the PowerPoint Presentation cross the road?

A. To get to the other slide.
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